Since I am decidedly uninspired today, I’m gonna let the Wheel O’ Topics tell me what to do. Spin, you crazy circle  you…

“Magazines that are hard to digest.”

Damn stupid Wheel.

Okay, then – Magazines that are hard to digest. Well, it’s been a while since my paper-eating days, but I would say that those glossy mags would probably go down the smoothest. The pulps, with their cheap and highly absorbent paper, are far more likely to end up jamming in your log flume which is a situation I never thought I would have to describe even in euphemistic terms.

Damn Wheel.

:deep sigh:

 The trick would be to drink plenty of water and make sure you chew throughly; pretend you’re making paper maiche. ( Which, in the most disgusting way possible, you are.) Be prepared for a night on the throne, that much roughage is sure to clean out the works. I suggest sticking with The Weekly World News and it’s tabloid brethren; while not technically magazines they will certainly do the job.

If you’ll excuse me, Mr. Crowbar and I need to have a chat with the Wheel O’ Topics.