I am, as many of you know, of the female persuasion.

While I’m not the girliest of girls, I still like small adorable things like kittens, most babies, and tiny toys you can get out of vending machines.

tiny turtle

Like this itty-bitty turtle - it's standing on my quilting ruler which has a 1-inch grid.

 

Now take that turtle – after you pry it from my cold and rapidly stiffening fingers, of course – and jam him and fifty of his closest friends into a pile a glue that resembles whipped cream.

Congratulations – you’ve created deco-den.

 

I'm pretty sure there are cell phones under all that crap.

 

This particular brand of insanity comes from the Land of Crazy, Japan. It apparently all started with cell phones, called denwa in Japan, and little shops you could go into to take your five hundred dollar sophisticated electronic device and make it look like a toy that came from the dollar store.

 

Needs more icing.

 

While those might look like  Cakewrecks, they are in fact real things. Girls carry them around in their purses next to their cans of Tentacle Repellent.

It has since spread to anything that can be decorated – picture frames, cameras, false nails.

I'm unclear as to how you would be able to wipe your ass while wearing these things. Maybe there's an attachment for that.

 

For the most part the bits of flotsam seem jammed on indiscriminately, but I have found a few that do look as if they were well-planned and have a clear theme.

Okay, that's kinda cute.

 

But on the other hand, I don’t think “Batman” and “rhinestones” are two things that should go together.

 

A little piece of my soul just died.

 

The most impressive thing about this, other than no one has gone blind from the sparkly bits or been choked to death by a plastic teddy bear, is that many of those little gidjets are handmade. People sell tiny molds for making the little cookies, donuts, fruits, and other bits. There are dozens of tutorials on YouTube on how to make the tiny food bits to decorate your crap with and numerous sites to help you figure out how many Hello Kitties you can cram onto a cell phone case.

 

AHHHH! My eyes!

 

There are even dozens of recipes for substitutes for the silicone-based “frosting” glue, which is very hard to find outside of Japan. Most seem to use some sort of caulk and add various ingredients to it.

It just baffles me why someone would want to.

 

Advertisements