Last weekend we came from from breakfast to the usual sight of Fearless waiting by the door, absolutely ecstatic to see me as if I had been gone for a month and not just an hour. Mother Dearest looks down at her.

MD “Fearless would make a great watchcat, she could just fluff a burglar to death.”

Me “I hope not, that would make her a fluffer and no one wants to see that.”

Mother Dearest gives me an odd look and I mentally whack myself on the back of the head.

Me “You don’t know what a fluffer is, do you?” She shakes her head and I try to find the most delicate way to describe this to my mother while standing in front of the kitchen. “Well, you see … In adult films there’s a person who has to make sure that the male performers are … ready to perform. They call it fluffing and the people who do it are fluffers.” By this point we are both giggling.

And then GhostDad chimes in from the living room.

GD “And you know this how?”

Me “Internet. I think it was on Ally McBeal as well.”

I head back to my room to hang up my coat and Mother Dearest appears at my door a second later.

MD “How would you even hire someone for that kind of job? Do you think they post ads or use an agency or something?”

This is how you can tell we are related.