The Things are visiting for a few days and are very excited to see their favorite aunt (me.) Thing 2 had grown tired of coloring and decided to play doctor. (Not like that.) After “diagnosing” and “treating” me for such things as “a sore knee” and “you have a cat in your tummy” with shots from a pencil and invisible bandages, I suggested that Mother Dearest could probably use the services of a doctor.

After MD “treated” Thing 2 for a fractured knee (and explained what fractured means, since she knows all the doctor words) it was MD’s turn. She suggested that she had carbuncles for Thing 2 to “treat” while I was offering helpful suggestions for other ailments in an attempt to get MD to laugh.

“Tell her she has a ticklish appendix! Massage her gall bladder! Apply some leeches!” (We had covered leeches, A.K.A. “vampire worms,” earlier) MD remained passive. Time to bring out the big guns.

“Check her for hemorrhoids!” MD began shaking with laughter and Thing 1, who was coloring nearby, wanted to know what a “hemmerid” was.

After having a bath, the girls came into my room to give me hugs (and to prolong the going to bed procedure for as long as possible) and Thing 1 noticed my pile of plastic dinosaurs. (Everyone has one of those, right?) I told them they could take a few upstairs to play with, with Thing 1 interpreted as “all that I can carry” and filled her little arms with the things. Thing 2 followed with most of the remaining dinosaurs a few minutes later. About five minutes later, Thing 1 returns to swap one of the dinosaurs for another. Ten minutes after that she came back and took the remaining dinosaurs upstairs, including the one she had swapped earlier, and left me dinosaurless. I think I’ll manage.

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