‘Twas the Nightmare before Christmas and there were problems parental
Neither Mom or Dad were sleeping; there were presents to assemble.

The manuals were spread on the floor with no care,
In hopes that the answers would be there somewhere.

The kids were all tucked away asleep in their room,
Each tick of the clock echoed “Doom. Doom.”

Momma threw up her hands while Daddy pounded the ground,
What a hell of a time for the ‘net to be down!

Little Jenny’s princess castle now had turbo thrusters,
And Jimmy’s SuperMecha Ninja smelled vaguely of mustard.

Gallons of coffee were brewed and consumed,
And they cursed and pleaded and fought and fumed

Then, all too soon, those happy cries came from above
Their two little darlings, the ones that they love

Down the stairs sounding like a herd of elephants,
Came two pairs of small feet headed straight for the presents.

Like little buzz-saws they tore through the wrappers,
They were no fools, they knew what they were after.

Mom and Dad braced themselves for the coming of tears,
Each vowing silently to do better next year.

From under the tree they heard their children’s loud cries,
But what’s this? They were having the time of their lives!

“Oh, Daddy!” Said Jenny “Look, my princess shoots a red laser beam!”
And Jimmy showed Momma how his Ninja could dance and sing.

In the end it was the best Christmas ever,
Even if nothing was followed to the letter.

For the joy of a child is not found in the present,
But the love within it, that’s quite apparent.

Still, next year everything would go much better,
if you didn’t wait ’til the last minute to put things together.

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