I have a new pen.

A super classy pen.

It looks pretty tame, but you see that button on the side? Look what happens when you press it.

IT’S A FRICKIN’ BATSIGNAL!!!!

I found it in the school supplies section at Wally World among a vast cornucopia of different geegaws and widgets. (I went looking for a dry erase board and came out with index cards, a batsignal pen, and no dry erase board. So it goes.) It might be nostalgia talking, but I don’t remember school supplies being this mad fancy.